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第1-10, 共53篇日记[首页][上页][下页][末页] |
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爲什麽日本对中國人有吸引力
日本人怎麽看中國人
一個美國人的看法...
It's understandable why many Chinese are more attracted to the West, or to Japan more than Chinese world.
You know ithe Chinese world intimately from growing up in a Chinese family, it's something too
familiar. You love it, but it can be overwhelming and you need to get away from it a bit.
Japan
is appealing because it's so efficient, civilized, and chic.It's clean, modern, and organized. But it is a
deeply insular society, and that's what I have a hard time with. In many
ways I feel Japanese are like the Germans of Asia. Very sophisticated and methodological,
but elitist. And the Chinese are like the Jews... we're sloppier and not as polished and organized, but our success draws on ancient wisdom, and we are both swamped in very rich civilization and traditions.
When
I was in China, I got impression from several Japanese friends that
they really look down on Chinese, kind of like Americans might look
down on latinos (拉丁美洲人). For example, the Japanese friends I met admitted would never actually marry a Chinese,
because it would be like marrying down. This bothered me. They do admire
Chinese history, though, and they all acknowledged that it is the root of their
culture.
安迪
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一個朋友問 了 我 關於“跨國婚姻的好處缺點．這是個很迷人的話題。 我可以寫一本書．．． 對我 來 跨國婚姻簡直是個民主與邊界的問題，
A friend asked about the disadvantage and advantage of having
international marriage. This is such a fascinating topic. I could write a book!
To me, "international marriage" is just a question of citizenship and borders.
（如下是朋友的专业翻译。謝謝你，玨！）
有一個朋友問我關於我對跨國婚姻優劣處的看法。我覺得這個一個特別有意思的話題，我甚至可以就這個話題寫一本書。對我來說，跨國婚姻是一個關於國籍與邊界的問題。
For example, if a Canadian and an American can marry this relationship is not unusual or
difficult. The countries are very close, and the people in Canada and U.S. are almost the same.
比如說，如果一個加拿大人和一個美國人結婚，那麼這個婚姻應該不會很不平常或是困難。這兩個國家的國土緊挨著，而且加拿大人和美國人幾乎沒有什麼不同。
If a Chinese citizen marries an American citizen , this is international, too. But putting aside immigration matters, what makes this case more interesting is the different *cultures*.
如果是一個中國公民和一個美國公民結婚，這也是跨國婚姻。把移民部分先放一邊，讓這段婚姻有意思的是不同的文化背景。
What I am referring to is more of the intercultural or "cross-cultural marriage". (跨文化婚姻） This is where there are interesting differences. 我這裡所指的更多是一種跨文化的婚姻。這才是有意思的不同所在。
Here are what I see to be some of the advantages and disadvantages of an intercultural/cross-cultural marriage:
下面讓我列舉一下我說看到的跨文化婚姻的優劣處：
a Advantages b Disadvantages
A為優點B為劣勢
1a Can learn each other's language 1b) May be not interested to learn each other's language
1A可以學習對方的語言；1B可能對對方的語言一點都不感興趣；
2a Can communicate in multiple languages 2b) May have misunderstanding or language barrier
2A可以用多種語言來交流； 2B語言可能會導致誤會或溝通障礙；
3a.Celebrate more holidays and traditions 3b) May be not interested in new holidays and
traditions
3A可以慶祝更多的節假日；3B可能對對方的節假日一點都不感興趣；
4a Can learn new customs,habits, foods, etc. 4)b May not adapt or to different customs, habits, foods.
4A可以學習了解新的風俗，習慣，或是食物等等；4B可能會不想或不能適應不同的風俗，習慣，或是食物；
5a Travel in each other's home country is a richer experience 5b) Couple's parents may not be open-minded.
5A能到對方的國家旅行是一種豐富的經歷； 5B對方的家長可能不是很開放；
6a The couples children will be more open-minded 6b) Children can be confused about their identity.
6A夫婦倆的孩子會更加開放；6B小孩可能會對他們的角色產生疑惑；
7a. A foreign spouse will be exposed to a much richer experience of his/her new country than immigrants who don't "marry out" 7b. The extended families may not connect as easily.
7A一個外國配偶能讓一個人對他或她的移民國家有更透徹的了解；7B對於各自的家人可能會不那麼容易溝通
For me, the advantages outweigh the disadvantages. But I think an intercultural marriage is not for everyone. It requires extra strong level of patience, curiosity, tolerance for difference, and positive outlook that many people do not have.
對我來說，跨文化婚姻利大於弊。但是我覺得這種婚姻並不一定都是和所有人。跨國婚姻需要更多的耐心，更多的好奇心，對不同更為接受，還要有一種積極的人生觀.
Keys to Success - 成功的關鍵
Looking
at these, the key is that the successful couple will actively learn about the
other side, in order to bridge the differences. I think that the
advantages will definitely be stronger than the disadvantages IF each
partner in the intercultural couple is involved in learning, and is
attracted to each other's language, holidays, customs, etc.
綜上所說，一個成功的跨國婚姻的關鍵在於積極主動的學習另一方的文化。我認為如果夫婦倆都樂於學習，並且為對方的語言和風俗習慣所吸引，那麼這種婚姻其利遠大於弊.
And of course when it comes to dealing with parents and children,
to communicate with them well and educate them as much as possible
about the intercultural aspect. I believe most parents will support an cross-cultural relationship if they are able to see their child is truly happy in it.
當牽涉到小孩和雙方家長的時候，應盡量盡可能的教育並和他們溝通關於跨文化的種種方面。我相信大多數的家長如果看到他們的孩子是真的開心，他們都會支持這段關係的.
Also, there can be interfaith
marriage （跨宗教婚姻） and interracial marriage. Interfaith
marriage (different religions) I think presents a big problem. Or if one spouse is religious and one is not, this creates a dangerous gap between them . The couple cannot really pray
together if they are different religions. In this way they cannot be close with each other. And if they will have children, it is extremely confusing to the
kids. Kids will often try to show that neither parent is a "favorite", so they will reject both religious belief systems. I strongly believe that the best way to parent is both parents agree on
the same religion. Or no religion at all.
相似的還有跨宗教婚姻和跨人種婚姻。我認為跨宗教婚姻（雙方有不同的宗教信仰）極富挑戰。相同的，如果配偶一方有宗教信仰而另一方沒有，這也會為他們倆造
成比較危險的鴻溝。如果夫妻倆的宗教信仰不同，他們就不能一起禱告。這樣的話，他們就沒法與對方親密無間。一旦他們有了孩子，這個問題會讓小孩相當困惑。
小孩通常會為了表示他們沒有更愛媽媽或爸爸而拒絕兩個宗教系統。我相信最好的方法是要么兩人相信同一種宗教，要么就是家裡沒有任何宗教。
For interracial marriage (跨人種婚姻）, some people do not accept this and think
it is wrong. It was illegal in the U.S. before the 1960's. But in
recent years people are accepting interracial relationships more and
more. It seems natural that opposites attract.
關於跨人種婚姻，有些人不能接受並且認為這是錯誤的。在1960年前，美國的跨人種婚姻是違法的。但是近幾十年來，人們對這種婚姻越來越接受。異性相吸，這似乎也是一個自然規律。
If there are kids involved it can be confusing for the kids to be mixed
race. Sometimes they aren't sure about their identity. On the other
hand, the mixed race kids usually get the best genes coming from 2 very different pools. So they are almost always very smart, attractive, and healthy.
但是當這段關係裡有孩子的時候，小孩有可能會很困惑，他們會對自己的角色產生疑慮。不過這些混血的小孩常常有著兩個非常不同的基因庫裡得到最好的基因。所以這些小孩常常都是非常聰明，非常漂亮，非常健康。
People from very different backgrounds are
meeting each other more than ever has happened in the history of human civilization.
This is because the world gets smaller and smaller with air travel, Internet,
international media, etc.
Because it is becoming more common, diversity is becoming more and more
acceptable in the world.
當今我們能接觸到越來越多來自不同背景的人，這是因為我們世界因為交通的便利，電腦網絡，或是國際媒體而變得越來越小。正因為如此，多元化也越來越為這個世界所接受.
Tiger Woods, the world golf champion with parents who are Thai and African-american, and Barack Obama, a brilliant statesman with white and black parents, are two great examples of the trend towards diversity in the U.S., and the potential successes of intercultural couples.
世界高爾夫球冠軍Tiger Woods(泰格伍茲 )有泰國人和非裔美國人的父母。我們的民主黨總統競選人Barack Obama（奥巴马）的父母分別是白人與黑人。這兩個都是美國多元化趨勢以及成功的跨文化婚姻的好例子.
andy
安迪
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中文語言一直對我有吸引力， 另外，以我語言學習發現我就喜歡上了華人的 人中關系方式， 對別人比較周到, 關心朋友與家人，這點 中國文化非常接近猶太文化。西方文化里這點太差的。這就是個人主義的缺點。 中國人才會照顧朋友。
因為跟中國人沒有語言障礙，我一直覺得跟自己人一樣。 再加上我要跟一位中國女士結婚。如此 可以在家里挑選我們兩個文化里的傳統養孩子，一起過的很幸福的生活。 所以我首先該了解她的文化，能跟她家人說共同語言，互相接受彼此的風俗習慣了。
美國文化有點太開放，我還是覺得我的文化背景跟華人的比較相似. 還古老家庭統最偉大. 美國也很偉大,但她的家庭觀念還不如中國的好.
歡飲評論，問題
安迪
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這些極小哺乳动物（英文＝'gerbils' ) 是時髦寵物在美國．它門也原先來自蒙古戈壁沙漠. 這些才出生兩個星期了， 所以眼睛還沒展開．生活還是負擔 一切都以來母親的照顧． 多看，就可以見到受媽媽的關心在它們溫馨的地下窩...
">
沙鼠
噁心的老鼠嗎？ 我看，所有的哺乳動物都基本都一樣．快樂，盼望，痛苦，滿意，難過，所有的感情它們都也感到．哺乳動物都是一家．我們都是上帝的創造品． 差別就在外表而已．最
迷人的是 看它們的本能行爲, 看它們取暖,心在跳，還有母親的認真照顧. |
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HOW DO YOU DECIDE WHO TO MARRY? (written by kids)
You got to find
somebody who likes the same stuff. Like, if you like sports, she should
like it that you like sports, and she should keep the chips and dip
coming. -- Alan, age 10
No
person really decides before they grow up who they're going to marry.
God decides it all way before, and you get to find out later who you're
stuck with.. -- Kristen, age 10
WHAT IS THE RIGHT AGE TO GET
MARRIED?
Twenty-three is the best age because you know the person FOREVER by then. -- Camille, age 10
HOW CAN A STRANGER TELL IF TWO PEOPLE ARE MARRIED?
You might have to
guess, based on whether they seem to be yelling at the same kids. -- Derrick, age 8
WHAT DO YOU THINK YOUR MOM AND DAD HAVE IN COMMON?
Both don't want any more kids. -- Lori, age 8
WHAT DO MOST PEOPLE DO ON A DATE?
Dates
are for having fun, and people should use them to get to know each
other. Even boys have something to say if you listen long enough. -- Lynn , age 8 (isn't she a treasure)
On the first date, they just tell each other lies and that usually gets them interested enough to go for a second date. -- Martin, age 10
WHEN IS IT OKAY TO KISS SOMEONE?
When they're rich. -- Pam, age 7
The law says you have to be eighteen, so I wouldn't want to mess with that.
- - Curt, age 7
The rule goes like this: If you kiss someone, then you should marry them and have kids with them. It's the right thing to do. -- Howard, age 8
IS IT BETTER TO BE SINGLE OR MARRIED?
It's better for girls to be single but not for boys. Boys need someone to clean up after them -- Anita, age 9 (bless you child)
HOW WOULD THE WORLD BE DIFFERENT IF PEOPLE DIDN'T GET MARRIED?
There sure would be a lot of kids to explain, wouldn't there? -- Kelvin, age 8
And the #1 Favorite is........
HOW WOULD YOU MAKE A MARRIAGE WORK?
Tell your wife that she looks pretty, even if she looks like a dump truck. -- Rick, age 10
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第1-10, 共53篇日记[首页][上页][下页][末页] |
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